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'I feel very lucky to have met him': Nick & Brian's friendship

Please note: this post is 91 months old and The Cares Family is no longer operational. This post is shared for information only

In our latest blog, volunteer Nick tells the story of his (13 month – and counting!) friendship with Brian.

Brian And Nick

'The thing about you and me Nick,' Brian once told me, 'is we've had very different lives'.

He's not wrong. 

We do have some things in common. We're both the youngest of three. We both live near the Elephant and Castle. And as you can see from the photo we both have a similar style (glasses, beard, a select few hairs on top). 

In fact our styles have got more similar in the year and a bit that we've known each other.  Brian has grown a beard and I've lost some hair. But the differences are still notable. I'm a child of the 80s. Brian's a child of the 40s. I'd never been to Elephant until I was in my mid-20s. Brian's been here all his life (more or less).

But the key fundamental difference is that I'm very lucky with my health and Brian isn't. As a result, he's pretty much stuck in the house, indeed stuck on his La-Z Boy recliner. The only times I've seen him out of it have been when he's had to go to hospital.

But despite this he doesn't let it get to him, at least not in front of me. Sometimes he needs to let off steam as we all do but mostly we just get right down to chatting about this or that.

Someone asked us what we talk about the other day and neither of us really knew what to say. We talk about what's happened in the news, or what's on telly. I like to find out about the various things he's got up to in his life or what Southwark was like back in the day. Brian has a lot of friends, mostly from when there was a pub at the end of the road and they'll pop in sometimes so I've got to know them as well. Whatever it is, it soon became very easy just to pop round and talk. And indeed we both find sometimes it’s easier to share things with each other than anyone else in our lives.

Elephant And Castle Hotel

Brian's now probably the friend I see most, not least because he's the one who lives nearest, and I feel very lucky to have met him. I've learnt a lot by hanging out with him, about the neighbourhood, dealing everyday with the NHS and the council, the very different kinds of lives that brush past each other in this bit of London. But mostly I've just learnt what it's like to have a good friend as a neighbour which is something you don't always get in London.

Brian and Nick were introduced through our Love Your Neighbour Programme.