Legacy
Legacy
Please note: this post is 83 months old and The Cares Family is no longer operational. This post is shared for information only
Dot (86 years old)
We chat, we laugh at our own jokes, we have a cup of tea – it’s brilliant.
I had just come out of hospital when I was introduced to Angela. I had been in hospital a while and I was nervous to go out. Angela started to encourage me to go for walks with her and things like that. Angela said would you like to go for a walk, and we’d go down to Herne Hill in the summer, and walk around. They have a Sunday Market down there and we have been down there a few times. It’s lovely to have someone to go out and about with. I started to go out on my own and my confidence has improved. I now go to local classes, yoga and play in my local bowls team.
I always spent time with younger people until I became unwell two years ago. I never felt different from them. But when I was at home and didn’t go out and had hardship you lose confidence and feel old. Then I met Angela. I feel like I can talk to Angela about everything and anything, and It really means the world. Sometimes there’s some things that you can find difficult to discuss but I can tell Angela.
I feel like I’ve known Angela all my life. She’s like family now. She shows me photos and tells me about her family and I feel like I know them. She’s met my family and they know about her and ask about her. She’ll make herself at home, put the tea on or have a J2O and a Kit Kat. We talk about our memories of Ireland, families, what’s going on in the world. I tell her what I’ve been doing in the day, what I’ve done at the weekend. She’ll tell me what she’s done.
Angela (28 years old)
We honestly get on so well! I come in and get a cup of tea. I definitely didn’t think that it would be such a comfortable and easy thing. We always find things to talk about. We never run out of conversation and the time just flies. If anything, it’s like, ‘Oh I really need to go!’.
We have a unique friendship that isn’t part of anything else. I don’t really see the rest of Dorothy’s life. I just see this couch and our occasional trips out. She can talk to me about things. And I can talk to her about things.
We talk about our families and show each other photos. My Mum and Dad are like, "Have you visited Dorothy this week? Is Dot okay, have you seen her?’ I think they are a bit jealous actually! I took my boyfriend to watch Dorothy playing bowls – she plays very well, she’s got loads of trophies in the kitchen – and she finally met him.
I love hearing Dorothy’s stories, they’re great and it’s so interesting to hear stories from a different time. We both moved from Ireland to London but in different time. When she was my age she’d already had five kids. The struggle was so much more than my day to day worries. Spending time with her makes me view society differently. I think more about what would happen to an older person in a given situation. I’ve gained so much and has made me think about things slightly differently.
I feel really lucky to have been introduced to Dorothy. I always come away from our time together in a good mood. My job can be quite stressful and when I get here I forgot about it. Being in London, you rush through life and you don’t really speak to people but the sofa – this sofa – you sit down and you take a bit of time. Older people can give you a sense of perspective – does it really matter, whatever happened at work today? There’s a much bigger picture.
Dot and Angela are one of sixty five Love Your Neighbour matches – south Londoners who wouldn't usually have met, but who can gain a lot from knowing one another. Find out more about Love Your Neighbour here.